May everyone’s wishes come true ——
索达吉堪布精彩开示录
Highlights of questions and answers in Khenpo Sodargye’s teachings
Must one first learn to love oneself in order to love others?
问：利他就要放弃自我，那放弃自我之前，是不是先要找到真我，就像爱他人就要先学会爱自己一样？Question: To benefit others one must relinquish the self. Does that mean that before one can do that, one has to find the true self? Is it the same as learning to first love oneself in order to love others?
If so, how can I find my true self, the real me?
Khenpo: If you wish to find your true self, it can be fully approached through the means of benefiting others.
按照佛教的观点，执著自我，实际上是一切痛苦的来源。According to the Buddhist viewpoint, the root cause for all suffering is grasping to the self.
大家也可以想一想，自己往昔所流过的眼泪，到底是为了自己，还是为了利益众生？Just think: Of all the tears we have shed in the past, were they for the sake of ourselves or for others?
一观察就会发现，人生中的一切痛苦、烦恼、不安，根源统统都是自我——为了“我”的工作，我们辛辛苦苦；Once we look into it, we’ll realize that all our suffering, afflictions and anxiety are rooted in self-grasping—for “my” job, we toil and moil;
for “my” relationship, we plunge into constant anxiety;
for “my” body, we try everything conceivable to satisfy it;
and for “my” lot, we impute all faults to others...
As long as there is self-grasping, suffering will follow, like a shadow that won’t go away.
而只有放弃自我、选择利他，证悟了无我的境界后，才能找到真我。Only through relinquishing self-interest and benefiting others will we attain an egoless state and find our true self.
This is the most profound aspect of Buddhism.
Young people today have to face intense competition in society and endure immense pressure in life.
但若能通过学习佛法，得到一定的境界，很多问题也就迎刃而解了。Many of these problems can be resolved easily through proper study and application of the Buddhist doctrines.
Therefore, the Dharma is an exquisite spiritual remedy for the world.
Is the altruism advocated in Buddhism unconditional?
问：佛教中提倡利他，但我主动去帮助别人，别人会不会因此而欠我的，被动接受了这种因果？Question: Altruism is advocated in Buddhism. However, when I help others on my own initiative, doesn’t this impose a karmic debt on them since they become the recipients of my favor?
Won’t it conflict with the idea of benefiting others?
堪布答：佛教中提倡的利他，是无条件的，不希求任何回报。Khenpo: The altruism advocated in Buddhism is unconditional; nothing whatsoever is expected in return.
在这种情况下，别人所接受的帮助，将来是不需要还债的。If it’s done in this way, the recipient of the favor does not have to repay the debt in the future.
就像一个东西，我借给你，你以后要还；但若是送给你了，你就不用还了。For example, if I lend you something, you have to return it to me later. But if I give it to you, you don’t have to.
If one does good deeds to seek good returns, is this deemed selfish?
问：佛教说“善有善报、恶有恶报”，那么，我们在做善事时，如果为了追求一个善报，这是不是体现了人性自私的一面？Question: In Buddhism it says, “Good has its reward and evil has its own consequences.” If we perform virtues to court favorable results, doesn’t it exemplify the selfish side of human nature?
Khenpo: In Buddhism, virtues can be done at different levels.
最低的层次，行善是为了追求善报，今天我供养佛陀、做善事，是想自己未来获得快乐。At the lowest level, performing good deeds is done to pursue favorable returns for oneself (I want to be happy tomorrow, and that’s why I’m making offerings to the Buddha today).
中等的层次，是把我做善事的功德，回向给天下无边的众生，让众生得到快乐。At the intermediate level, good deeds are done for the benefit of limitless sentient beings, with all merit dedicated to them.
最高的层次，是明白所做的一切如幻如梦，我做的善事和“我”全部不缘，安住于远离四边八戏的空性中，这叫做三轮体空。At the highest level, good deeds are done with the realization that all actions are but illusory and dreamlike and there’s no clinging to “I,” “my good deed,” or the “recipient.” We rest in emptiness, which transcends all extremes and elaborations. This is what is meant by “to be free of the three concepts.”
当然，也有人连想获得善报的概念都没有，只是随顺别人做一个善事而已。In addition, there are people who don’t have the slightest intention to be compensated in return; they just do good deeds spontaneously.
Hence, virtuous deeds are done at many levels. Wishing for a good return is merely one of them.
Khenpo Sodargye《Achieve by Doing》
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