禅与心理分析的碰撞（三）

Oscillations:Zen & Psycho-analytic Versions

PAUL C. COOPER

保罗•古柏

The intensity ofZen practice both demands and engenders passion. Passion is primary, emergingfrom the heart-center, the rhythm of the heart, and from the heartbeat ofpsychic life. Buddhist cosmology describes passions in both the god realm andhell realm states and in both states of ecstasy and equipoise. In myexperience, however, for the most part, Zen Buddhism does not deal fully withemotional life.

禅修的强度既需要激情也产生激情。激情很重要，它从心中央生起、从心的节律生起、从灵魂生命的心跳中生起。佛教宇宙学描述了天道和地狱道状态的激情，也描述了狂喜和平衡状态的激情。然而我的大部分体验里，禅宗并没有完全处理好情绪人生。

The Buddhistbelief is that over-emphasis on emotional life will obscure realization ofultimate reality because the transient emotions such as anger, love, hurt, andenvy, for example, are aspects of the phenomenal world or relative reality. Theproblem, as I see it, lies in an unhealthy avoidance or wholesale denial of theemotions and their significance for the internal world of the individual inregard to one’s relationship to self, to others and to practice. Thisrelativizing tendency becomes one of degree. Neither over-indulgence nor denialof emotional life is tenable.

佛教认为过分强调情感生活会障碍对实相的认知，因为暂时性的情绪，譬如愤怒、热爱、伤害、嫉妒等都是现象界或相对真实的不同方面。我认为，这个问题是因为病态地避免、或者说整体性地否认情绪、以及否定情绪对个人内心世界中与自己、与他人、与禅修练习的关系的意义。这个相对化的倾向变成了等级之一。即不过分纵容、也不完全否定情绪才是可取之道。

Passion/ragepermutations mark an experiential converging point between time spent on thezafu and time spent on the analytic couch. Through Zen I become sensitized toboth subtle and powerful energies. Buddhists often view rage as reflectingseparation, or unfulfilled longing. In terms of separation and union, what isthe psychic distance between something being given, the promise of somethinghappening, and something being taken away? Sometimes feelings of separationhave to do with what we seek, especially during the experience ofself-fragmentation and/or when the oneness of mystical union is imminent. Whenapproaching the oneness of mystical union, passion evolves into compassion.Dissolved subject and object distinctions close the you/me gap.

激情/愤怒的置换标志着经验的聚集点，会合了在坐垫上花的功夫和在心理分析床上的功夫。通过禅修，我对微弱和强大的能量都很敏感。佛法将愤怒认为是隔绝或未达成期望的反应。提到隔绝与组合，给予、承诺做到某事与拿走之间的心理距离是什么呢？有时候，隔离的感觉要看我们在追寻什么，特别是自我分裂的体验和/或当神秘组合的统一性迫近之时。当靠近神秘组合的统一性时，激情演变为慈悲。主体与客体区别的消失填平了自己与他人之间的沟壑。

In Zazen, thereis the promise of satori, connectedness with self, with other, with what isbeyond self, with teachers, with Buddha. Through waiting, sitting, waiting,Zazen locates raw emotion, thought and sensation. In this experience, I feelrage bubbling over. I watch the volcanic eruption, watch myself, selves, andothers as form melts, crystallizes, shatters in permutations of liquid psychiclava in an emotional upsurge and outflow. Passion swirls as forms and imagesspew forth. Multi-colored mind flowers blossom and melt away. Prolonged zazenbuilds the capacity for handling increasing intensities.

在坐禅中，你可能会开悟，连通了自、他、超我、师和佛。通过等待、入坐、等待，禅修发现了粗大情绪、思想和感觉的位置。在这方面的体验里，我感受到怒气从各个地方冒出来。我看着火山喷发，看着自己、自我、他人在情绪高涨外溢时，心理岩浆融化、结晶和粉碎。激情旋转着，就像形状和图像喷涌而出。多姿多彩的精神之花开放又凋零。长时间打坐使人有能力应付不断增加的强度。

In this zendo, Isit with rage and find myself opening into passion or perhaps passion openinginto what I imagine is me. Can rage intensify and burn through enough of me toreveal itself as passion? Can I grow through rage, past rage’s destructiveness,until it transforms?

在这个禅堂中，我在愤怒中打坐，发现我自己通向了激情，或者是激情进入了那个想象中的自己。当我心中的愤怒加强和燃烧到足够程度，会不会就表现为激情？我能不能越过愤怒及其破坏性而成长、直到它转化？

I embrace thehorror and disturbance of felt rage. I embrace the enlivening passion fires. Iswallow fire and dream rainbows. Fire–pure energy—transforms into amulti-faceted gem, a spring cornucopia of blossoming psychic flowers.

我拥抱着恐惧和由于感受到愤怒的不安，拥抱着活跃的激情火焰。我吞下了火与梦的彩虹。纯能量的火焰转变成多面的宝石，一个盛开心灵鲜花的春天宝藏。

Rage ispassion’s burning bush. The deadliness of rage can feed the aliveness ofpassion: raging passions, passionate rages. The rage feels tense, tight, mybody, nerves, muscles, bones, joints constricted. The ache intensifies. Eachheartbeat pulses through my body into my limbs, to the ends of my fingers andtoes. My thoughts become simultaneously effusive and restricted. Oscillationsspin out from feelings of hurt, indignation, disappointment, failed grasping.Tighter and tighter circles of thoughts and feelings spin around repetitivemotifs.

愤怒是激情燃烧中的荆棘。愤怒致命性能够给激情的生存提供养料，即愤怒的激情、炽烈的愤怒。愤怒使人紧张和僵硬，我的身体、神经、肌肉、骨骼和关节都紧缩着，疼痛不断加强。每一次心跳似乎都传到了四肢，乃至手指和脚趾。我的思想变得既流散又约束。振荡从伤害、愤怒、失望以及失去掌控的感觉中回旋出来，围绕着重复的主题，思想和感觉绕的圈子越来越紧。

Yet, these tightqualities of rage reveal openings to passion. Beyond the dialectical tensions,pure energy evolves, permeating every cell and fiber of my being. The pure fluidenergy of rage/passion, rises and subsides with varying proportions, differingdegrees of intensity and color. When the tail of rage’s tiger is fully graspedand embraced, it becomes passion. Transformed rage becomes a lived passion forpeace, for creature-comforts, for eros, sensate pleasures, connectedness,aliveness. In its variations, it may include a passion for music, writing,painting, creating and destroying. Rage transforms into orgasmic passions,kitchen-sink passions, dish washing activities, garbage collecting andremoving. All of it!

然而，愤怒的这些坚固的品质打开了通向激情的通道。在辩证的紧张之外，纯粹的能量出现了，弥漫着我身体的每一个细胞、每一个纤维。愤怒与激情之纯粹能量流升起又消退，有不同比例、不同强度和特征。当愤怒之虎的尾巴被紧紧抓住和接受利用时，它变成了激情。愤怒转化成为活生生的激情，渴望和平、渴望物质享受、渴望爱、快乐、连通和活着。其他情况下，还包括对音乐、写作、绘画、创造和破坏的激情。愤怒转变成极度兴奋的激情、厨房水槽式的激情、洗碟子、垃圾清理和倾倒。全部都是！

Similarly,psychoanalysis gives meaning to bits and pieces of raw experience. Continuedsitting in the ever-widening oscillations of both processes brings into thepresent situation an awareness of inner obstructions. In both cases, awarenessdissolves rage, which, if suffered, transforms into passion.

类似的，心理分析给零零散散的原始体验赋予意义。持续处于日益增加的两个过程的振荡之中，使我现在开始注意到内心的障碍。在两个情况下，注意力都遣散了愤怒，而如果能感受到愤怒，愤怒就会转变成激情。

Passion, atbest, becomes longing for union with the divine, with divine-lover, with theuniverse, with truth, life, death, and infinite moment. One may experience thedepths of one’s own being as an intimate connection, what Zen describes as‘‘the face before I was born.’’

充其量，激情会变成对与神、爱神者、宇宙、真理、生命、死亡和无限时刻结合的渴望。人们可能会体验到密切相关的自我深处，这就是禅宗所谓的“未生之前的面目”。

Psychoanalyticand Zen passions translate as passions that oscillate between work and play,love and hate, consuming and being consumed. Not only do they oscillate, theyeventually transform play to work and work to play. Love and hate passions thatformerly split asunder, dissolve andmerge.

心理分析和禅的激情转换为工作与娱乐、爱与恨、消耗或被消耗之间碰撞的激情。它们不仅碰撞，而且最终工作变成了娱乐、娱乐变成了工作。从前分开的爱与恨的激情，现在溶合为一体。

The oscillationbetween rage and passion and the potential for transformation pertains even tothe death passions which find an epitome of artistic and spiritual expression inthe highly regarded death poems of the great Zen masters. For example, Date-Soko(1089–1163) writes:

愤怒与激情之间的碰撞以及转变的可能性甚至属于死亡激情，在艺术与精神表达里发现了死亡激情的缩影，尤其在受到高度赞许的禅宗高僧有关死亡的偈颂里。譬如，大慧宗杲(1089–1163)这样写道：

Life’s as we

Find it–deathtoo.

A parting poem?

Why insist?(Stryk and Ikmoto, 1991, p. 18)

生亦只恁么，

死也只恁么。

有偈与无偈，

是甚么热大？

The consequencesof the synthetic process of oscillating dialectic can be far-reaching. Theradical misguided Moslem Jihad represents a contemporary manifestation withhorrific global implications at the crossroads of life and death. At theextreme, even misguided and malignant life and death passions might evolve inoscillations between collective turbulence and peace.

碰撞辩证法合成过程的后果可能有深远的意义。极端被误导的穆斯林圣战就是当代一个典型的证明，在生死交叉路口产生了可怕的广泛影响。在极端情况下，即使是误入歧途和恶性的生死激情也可能发展成共同的动荡与和平之间的碰撞。

Rage, in its rawform, expresses separation, subject and object disconnection, but alsofunctions to maintain self/other distinctions. Dualistic thinking functions tosplit rage and passion creating and perpetuating a seemingly unbridgeable gap.Access to passion becomes lost. The multi-faceted gem that life can be becomesflattened and one-dimensional.

原始形态的愤怒代表隔离、主体与客体分离，同时也起到维持自他区别的作用。二元思维起到割裂愤怒与激情的作用，并使二者间产生了看起来永远无法逾越的鸿沟。靠近激情就变成了迷途。本来生命可以变成多面宝石，但现在却只有一个角度的平面了。

Oscillatingthrough the terrain of the amorphous, intuitively felt Zen experience pairedwith the specificity of the psychoanalytic encounter has made me ever-consciousof the child who waits for his mother; the ideal mother who never comes, whopromises to come, but fails, the mother who makes promises that she cannotkeep. I imagine these as ‘‘womb promises,’’ shattered by a too-soon birth, aninduced labor, a forced delivery. These failed promises, in the context of achild’s longings, become buried in bedrock as unremembered longings.

碰撞着穿越不确定地带，直观地感受到伴随着心理分析相遇特征的禅修体验，这使我一直感觉像一个等待母亲的小孩；但想象中的母亲一直没有来，虽然她说过要来，但没能来，她无法信守自己的承诺。我把这看作是“子宫诺言”，由于早产、引产和堕胎而粉碎了。对一个儿童来说，这些无效的诺言深深埋在心灵根本之处成为被遗忘的期盼。

When bedrock isshattered, these longings become pathways. What is Truth? Are these longingsabout motherly love, or the absence of it, from a mother who finds it impossibleto hold her infant in her arms? Or is truth reaction formation and repressedpassion/rage? Within me, oscillations range from fear to a wish to smash. Whatwas it like to be my pregnant mother, to be pregnant with me, her son? What wasit like to be the son within her womb?

当心灵根本粉碎时，这些期盼变成了道路。什么是真相？对母爱的渴望和缺失了母爱，都来自一位无法将自己的婴儿抱在怀里的母亲吗？真相是反应形成和压抑的激情/愤怒吗？在我心底，振荡的范围从害怕到希望再到粉碎。当我母亲怀着她的儿子——我时，她是什么样子呢？在她子宫里面的儿子又是什么样子呢？

Mother andson–one! What was it like to have the womb-son ripped away too soon? An infant‘‘dropped’’ too soon by an induced labor bears the scar of the violence of aforceps-forced birth. Then, there is the ever-present reminder to the motherthat her son was torn away. There is the inevitable fact that the son, in someway, knows of this wound through the eyes of the mother.

母亲和儿子浑然一体！将子宫里的儿子过早剥离出去会怎么样呢？用引产方法将一个胎儿迅速地从母体里“拉”出来，这个胎儿就会有用钳子压迫的暴力伤痕。而且，这也会一直提示着这位母亲，她的儿子被迫离开了。在某种程度上，她的儿子通过母亲的双眼知道了这一伤害是不可避免的事实。

Whose longingsare these that I feel when plunging into abysmal emptiness and despair? Arethese longings mine or hers? Or both? The memory-shattered aging mother of thepresent speaks poignantly and passionately to her son calling, ‘‘I miss my son,my son, my love.’’

当陷入无边无际的空虚和失望时，我所感觉的这些是谁的期盼呢？这些是我的期盼，还是她的期盼？亦或两者都是？现在被记忆所震惊的老母亲痛苦而热切地回应她儿子的呼唤：“我想我儿子，我最爱的儿子！”

Does theremembered and longed for promise of gratification, paired with the reality ofbrokenness and unavailable nourishment become the psychological palate fromwhich present experience derives its color? Overlays of abyssal colors obscurethe moment’s truth despite the suddenly emerging force of past memories. Whenpulling on the rage thread, passion unravels. When following the passionthread, what will one find? Psychoanalytically, I experience,

与碎裂的现实和不存在的营养并存的、记忆或者期盼中喜悦的承诺，是否变成了衍生当前体验色调的心理嗜好？不管突然出现过去记忆的力量，各种深深的颜色重叠起来遮蔽了这一时刻的真相。当用力拉起愤怒之线，激情就散开了。而追随着激情之线时，你会发现什么呢？我以心理分析的方式体验到：

Anger, fear,passion, from this couch

Looking up;

where a hungrydawn

swallows ragingstars from an ink sky.

从这个沙发里仰望，

愤怒、恐惧、激情；

渴望的黎明

在墨染的天空中吞没了愤怒之星。

In the zendo,sitting still on my zafu, I reach the limits of what can be suffered. I am backto breathing and sitting, hearing the ringing bell, the wood block’s clap, upand slowly walking once again.

在禅堂里，静静地坐在坐垫上，我达到了所能感受的极限。我回到了呼吸和静坐，听着铃声响起，传来打板声，我站起来，再次慢慢经行。

From this zafu,

just past theopen window,

between barebranches

the rising dawnsun shimmers

on awind-rippled lake.

从这个坐垫望出去，

刚好透过敞开的窗户，

在裸露的枝条间

初生黎明之日，

在微风拂过泛起涟漪的湖面上

闪烁微光。

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reparation and other Works:1921–1945. U.S.A.: Delacourt Press/Seymour Lawrence. (1975), pp.

262–289.

Shibayama, Z. (2000). TheGateless Barrier: Zen Comments on the Mumonkan. Trans.: S. Kudo.

Boston, MA: Shambhala.

Stryk, L., Ikemoto, T.(1973). Zen Poems of China and Japan: The Crane’s Bill. N.Y.: Grove Press.

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译者：阿游

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二校：圆悲

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